Saying “I Do” in Islam: A Guide to Muslim Marriage Consent (Ijab & Qabul)

Muslim marriage is a contract.

The contract is established when one of the future spouses offers (Ijab) and the other accepts (Qabul). Without a mutual, heartfelt exchange of consent, there is no marriage.

A Muslim marriage is not created by an official or religious representative but by the agreement of the spouses (whether through a wali or not)

In three Sunni schools, the order in which offer and acceptance occur is unimportant. However, for the Hanbali school, the offer must come from the wife’s wali first.

It is not necessary to use the Arabic language to enter into a marriage contract. Any other language may be used as long as the offer and acceptance are sufficiently clear and understood.

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1 – The Husband: Always Gives Consent in Person

In an Islamic marriage, the husband always gives his consent in person.

2 – Previously Married Woman: Her Clear Consent is Essential In An Islamic Marriage

A woman who was married before must give her consent and it must be strictly respected (Bukhari Hadith 6945).

• Either through the required guardian (wali) for the Maliki, Shafi’i and Hanbali schools
• Or with or without a guardian, where appropriate, for the Hanafi school.

Her consent must be given clearly (Bukhari Hadith 5136, Muslim Hadith 1419).

3 – Adult Woman Never Married: Varies by School

There are several situations depending on the legal school (madhab).

• Hanafi School: Valid Marriage Without Guardian (But Advises Seeking Consent)        

The Hanafi school allows and accepts the validity of a marriage without the presence or agreement of the guardian. This school’s position is clear : The wife can get married if she chooses and the marriage of a free, adult woman who is of sound mind, without the permission or even advice of her guardian, is valid.

However, it is recommended that a woman of this Islamic school who wants to get married first try to convince her guardian or parents to allow her to get married as she wishes and with their consent.

• Maliki, Shafi’i & Hanbali Schools: Requires Guardian’s Consent (With Justification for Refusal)

For an adult woman who has never been married (birk), her guardian’s consent is required and the guardian can accept or refuse the marriage. However, the guardian may not refuse a marriage without giving a valid reason for his choice. The reason must be based on protecting the interests of the person under his care.

It is strongly recommended (wajib) that the guardian ask the future wife for her consent, which can be granted by an approving silence.

If there is a disagreement because the wali has wrongly refused, the dispute may be brought before a Muslim judge.

Offer and acceptance of Muslim marriage must follow four specific rules.

1 – Verbal Consent In A Muslim Marriage

• Hanafi & Maliki School: Clear Wording Without Doubt.

There is no specific way to word the consent to marry for the Hanafi and Maliki schools. It is enough for the words to be spoken clearly and not leave any doubt as to the wishes of the parties about the marriage.     

• Shafi’i & Hanbali School: Use of “Nikah” or “Zawaj” or Derivatives (or Translation Equivalent).

The Shafi’i and Hanbali schools require the use of either the words “Nikah” or “Zawaj” or the verbs derived from these terms. 

The Arabic words are not necessary and their translation into any language is valid.

It is enough for the term “marriage” or “marriage contract,” regardless of the language, to be present in the offer and acceptance.

For the Shafi’i school, the offer and acceptance must include these terms, while the Hanbali school does not require these terms in the offer. Nikahcontract.com has, of course, taken these particularities into account in its guide on the marriage process (see guide: Example Wedding Ceremony to Follow).

2 – Consent During Contract Meeting (Majlis): Preferably Immediate or Within Same Gathering

The offer and acceptance must take place during the “contract meeting” (majlis).

The contract meeting begins when the offer is stated and continues until the parties leave.           

Preferably, acceptance will occur immediately after the offer or at least while the parties are gathered during the contract meeting. However, the marriage is valid even if acceptance is not immediate. If some time elapses between the offer and the acceptance and there is nothing to show that the offer was withdrawn, then the contract is valid as long as the contract is signed before the end of the contract meeting.

3 – Guardian’s (Wali) Role In A Muslim Marriage Consent

• Maliki, Shafi’i & Hanbali: Guardian Gives Consent (Tirmidhi 1101)

The wife’s guardian is her agent or representative.

The rule in the Maliki, Shafi’i and Hanbali schools (Tirmidhi Hadith 1101) is that only the guardian can give the wife’s consent.

• Hanafi: Adult Woman Can Accept Directly

Only in the Hanafi school can she accept in person, if she is of age.

4 – Clarity and Understanding Of The Offer

Each spouse (or the wife’s wali) must have heard and understood the proposal and acceptance from one another. The proposal of marriage must be offered without condition or violence, or mistake about the person.

In addition, the acceptance must correspond to the offer of marriage on all points. For example, there can be no discrepancy about the identity of the spouses.

Learn more about:

• The Wife’s Rights In An Islamic Marriage
• Understanding a Husband’s Rights in Islamic Marriage